Guilt, for me, is that one emotion which can ruin every positive experience I have.
It is torturous, and anyone who has felt it will know exactly what I’m talking about.
The energy of the emotion is full of should's and must's, and easily becomes a toxic habit without us even realising it.
I remember a day, when I was in my 20's, where I noticed, and became aware of this emotion. I could feel it's grip eating me from the inside, and I even remember thinking that it was quite possibly, the worst emotion that i had ever felt.
It stopped me in my tracks, and I knew that I didn't want to live my life feeling this way any more. I whispered to myself, through bated breath 'Enough is enough'.
And in that breath, I made a promise to myself that I work out a way to rid myself of the habit of feeling guilty. That i would look for a way to open myself up to sovereignty, and find a new way of BEing in the world. I was sick n tired of 'getting stuck' in guilt no matter what i did, and the way it would take over my life was pulling me out of alignment with who I wanted to become, and what I truly wanted to do with my time and in my life.
At first, giving up the habit of feeling guilty was super-challenging. After all, I had identified with it all my life. Always acting out of guilt. Allowing the guilt to drive my decisions or in-decisions or worse, suppressing the emotions so far down, that it took a plethora of drugs and alcohol to drown it out.
But, I was committed, determined to feel guilt-free.
Having gone through the part that was (in hindsight) the most challenging, I became aware of what I felt, and I DECIDED what I didn't want to feel.
The next step was to live differently, and in doing so, FEEL different.
I didn’t have a coach.
Nor someone to teach me how to retrain my mind. No meditation techniques, or any other therapies. This was before yoga became a lifestyle for me. Way before i knew what neuroplasticity neuroscience was. I simply decided what I didn't want, and what I wanted instead.
And that’s the thing - you have to DECIDE AND THEN STICK TO YOUR GUNS.
It’s a decision that came from so deep down, that it was an organic transition.
The fear of living with guilt for the rest of my life, tormented me more than the hurt, anguish and challenge it was to break that habit.
So, how did I do it?
The Key to Change is to disrupt the familiar! Looking back now, I can see that this is actually a THING. Read more about it here.
You have the power to change whatever it is that's not serving you. Whatever it is that is making you unhappy. As long as you have a strong and unshakeable commitment to the process.
Negative emotion states stop the momentum & flow of energy through the body, and instead of being in instead of being in the flow, you'll find yourself stuck, because your energy is stuck.
So to begin:
The first practice - Is a 5 minute Meditation; which you can download here
You may ALSO want to aromatically anchor - The second part of this is to use essential oils that have a fresh, woody aroma to help counteract emotions of anger and guilt. They will promote the liberating feelings of contentment, relief, and patience and allow the emotions to pass through you.
I use two doTERRA blends from the emotional aromatherapy range, called FORGIVE & MOTIVATE.
I use them at different times of the day, Motivate for the morning, and Forgive of an evening.
This is how I personally use them.
MOTIVATE: 1-2 drops in the palms of my hands, and rustle the oil through my hair so that as I go through my day, I’m inhaling the aroma constantly.
As with everything, there is intention when practicing, so I’m bringing to mind the negative emotion like guilt or pessimism, and I’m consciously, in my mind, replacing it with feelings of courage.
This blend of mint and citrus essential oils is so beautiful, and because I’ve created a sensory trigger, this oil blends invigorates my senses, and also brings about a sense of joy and confidence almost immediately after inhaling her aroma.
FORGIVE Touch: Roll onto my heart-space, uttering words of love, compassion and forgiveness for myself and all those who are involved in this ‘guilt’ habit having been formed. There’s no space in my life for resentment or unrest, so this process of using the oil on my heart chakra, is a powerful reminder to go within, and find that special place inside that is the same as you.
Thirdly - You can also learn this MANTRA and use it throughout the day to remind you of the allowance of emotions through and in your experience.
I am you. I am that. In you, I find myself.
Daily practising of the above, along with your commitment to change, without self-judgement and self-condemnation along the way, is the first step towards opening yourself up to new possibilities.
HOW TO LIVE A LIFE YOU LOVE
(without feeling Stressed-Out, Guilty, or having Decision-Fatigue in the process)
My Proven 3-Step System For Understanding and Working WITH your Emotions, even if you're Stressed Out, Overwhelmed, and have Decision Fatigue